Author: Melissa

Although a discussion of Jewish dietary laws was part of last week’s Torah reading, most of us like to eat each day. I know that I do! That means that thinking about Kashrut is a subject for any day, not just on the Shabbat where we read a particular portion from the Torah.  It’s too easy to get bogged down in the various details that we always associate with our dietary laws. I think there’s an overriding principle at work and that can help us keep Kashrut in perspective. As Rabbi Holtz taught about the difference between chametz and matzah at Passover, that principle is time.  In our too-busy lives, Kashrut asks us to slow down before consuming a meal. Putting on the brakes gives us a chance to ask about what it is we are about to eat. Where did it come from? How was it processed? Is that item on our plate good for us to eat? And we now ask all of these questions from an ethical as well as from a ritual or nutritional perspective. How did producing our food affect our planet? How were the workers who harvested our produce treated? Are the processes that are feeding us sustainable? Although our ancestors saw the dietary laws through a different lens, I think that some of these concerns were theirs as well. This most basic but most important part of our daily lives ties us to previous generations. As we sit down to have our Shabbat meals let’s consider all of the factors that make up the meal in front of  us. B’tayavon!  Good appetite and Shabbat Shalom!

Shalom!  Come celebrate our teens with us as they lead us in prayer this evening!  As members of the Union for Reform Judaism (URJ) our TBA family is part of an international umbrella organization.  We are a part of a network of Reform congregations who help to form and reform political policies, share best practices, study and worship together, and when in need help each other through sorrows. Within the URJ family there are many sub-organizations Hebrew Union College, Women/Men of Reform Judaism, ARZA, RAC and NFTY.   As we conclude each b’nai mitzvah service we give each of our kids a NFTY certificate as a gift from the North American Federation of Temple Youth (NFTY) towards a trip to Israel as part of a NFTY tour in High School or College.  Traveling to Israel is transformational and traveling to Israel with your peers is a memory and bond that will shape a young person’s life and commitment to our community.  TBA has worked hard to create a Youth Group that is strong, that contributes to the community at home and at large and helps to create these kinds of lasting memories for our kids that will connect them to TBA and the Jewish world.  Our kids are fantastic!  They are young leaders waiting to change the world who are being influenced by their participation in NFTY through, our youth group, our NFTY region, URJ summer camps, regional and national events.  Just 2 weeks ago 2 of our very own, Jack Nienaltow and Hannah Prince were elected to the regional NFTY board.  I am very proud of our kids and you should be too!  Join us this evening as our Youth Group takes to the bima to lead us in prayer, to show us what they are learning about Judaism and to kvell at the talent and dedication of these young leaders.

Our Youth Group has grown and developed into a vibrant program because of the commitment and dedication of our professional staff, our lay leadership and its leaders.  I would be remiss in discussing the success of our Youth Group without mentioning Gerry Hecht our Youth Group advisor.  Gerry is dynamic, creative, patient and nurturing and our kids love him.  Gerry, many thanks to you and Patti for all that you do for our kids!

See you tonight!

Passover is not easy. There are two giant seders to organize and cook for, and then there are 8 days of trying to come up with palatable meals for my family. And let’s face it, there are only so many ways to make a potato!

As I made the kosher for Passover pancake mix this morning it occurred to me that this whole week is a lot of work.  And I am not sure if it is really what was intended by the prohibition of eating leavened bread.  I mean, is the idea to make us feel like we are eating differently? Is it so that we actually feel, wholly, the sense of separation from our usual routines?  That seems to be the spirit of the law – that we should take this time and remember what it was like to leave Egypt, what it means to be free.  By breaking from our normal eating routine, we are constantly reminded that this week is different. In this case it would seem kosher for Passover pancakes don’t really work – because to my kids, they are still getting a (somewhat) “normal” breakfast. While they do not taste like regular pancakes, they are still pancakes and therefore not such a break in routine.

But these pancakes are perfectly acceptable according to the hallacha, the letter of the law. They contained nothing leavened. If the purpose is to follow the rules then kosher for Passover pancakes and the like are perfectly acceptable.

Which is more important, the spirit of the law or the letter of the law?

What I quickly realized as I flipped the pancakes is that for me, kosher for Passover pancakes are both. Because although to my kids it is not a huge break in routine, for me, it is. Usually, they throw a few Eggo waffles in the toaster and I am not involved in breakfast. On Passover, I have to make breakfast  (as well as every other meal)–which is  a complete break from my normal routine. This is certainly fulfilling the spirit of the law. Each and every one of the eight days I am forced to remember that these days are not like all the others in my year. I am physically doing something differently, not just eating something different. One might not think that extra cooking could help you feel the spirit of anything, but in fact for me, it does. So I will continue to make kosher for Passover foods that look like the real thing because believe it or not, the process of shopping, preparing and serving these different meals reminds me every day that it is Passover and perhaps paradoxically, that I am free.

Wishing you all a happy and fulfilling end of Passover!

Pamela Joy Barkley

I’m writing these words in Jerusalem, just a few moments after officiating at a congregant’s bar mitzvah at the Wall in Jerusalem.  (We were delayed this morning about 45 minutes because the Secret Service would not let us leave our hotel until President Obama, who is staying just up the street, had left for the day.)  It is always wonderful to be in Jerusalem, but there is something extraordinary about passing the Torah from generation to generation in the shadow of the Wall.  As I explained this morning, the difference between visiting other countries and visiting Israel is that the history you learn here is our history, and the people who made this history are our ancestors.  They are on each one of our family trees.  The people who stood on these very paving stones by the Wall were our great great great etc. grandparents.  The words of the Torah we read are exactly the same as the ones they read 2000 years ago.  The sense of connection and of history and continuity is palpable.  Though I am leaving here before Shabbat comes in, I will carry with me the spirit of Jerusalem, and I hope to share it with you as we celebrate Shabbat at TBA.

A census, Haman, a rare bovine, the month of Nisan. What do these items have in common? And what meaning do they have for us today? Now that we have reached the “quiet Shabbat” with no additional reading it’s time to look back on the four special Shabbatot that always proceed Passover. We start each year’s cycle with Shabbat Shekalim followed in turn by Shabbat Zachor, Parah and HaChodesh.  Shekalim speaks about the census that was taken and how each person paid a half shekel which could then be counted to know how many Israelites there were. Zachor, always read on the Shabbat before Purim, reminds us about Amalek and how we need to recall what Amalek did to us while in the dessert. The command to wipe out the name and memory of Amalek is the basis for our use of groggers to blot out the name of Haman who is considered a descendant of Amalek. Parah, perhaps the strangest of the readings, speaks of the parah adumah, the unblemished red heifer which was used in a ritual to make sure everyone was ritually pure to celebrate Passover. HaChodesh, “The month”  refers to Nisan and this reading occurs on the Shabbat before the start of the month in which Passover falls. Since all of these readings come from the Torah and describe ancient events we need to find their meaning for us today. To me, Shekalim reminds us of the meaning of each individual and the half shekel represents our equality as beings created in God’s image. Zachor speaks of memory and reminds us of our historical background especially as we prepare to retell the Passover story. Parah, a ritual that we certainly do not perform today reminds us of holiness and purity. HaChodesh reminds us of time and the start of the month of Nisan can be one last “reality check” that Passover is just around the corner. As all of us get ready to observe Pesach recalling these four special readings can help put us in the right frame of mind. Anita and I wish all of you a Chag Sameach!

Shabbat shalom!  I love that time in the morning in the house when I am the only one there and it is quiet.  I love swimming because as I submerge, push off from the wall and start to swim there is a silence that I can’t explain but that is magnificent. I am not the only one who likes it quiet.  There are now quiet cars on trains so that people can relax, work, read, meditate and/or sleep without fear of being disturbed by those on their cell phones.  It is said that “silence is golden” and yet many of us are extremely uncomfortable in silence.  As part of the recent survey about worship times I was fascinated by the number of comments about music during services.  There were the typical responses: sing more, sing less, sing the traditional version, sing new music, clap, don’t clap, more piano, less piano etc. But the comment that surprised me the most was the one looking for silence.  The question raised was why do we announce a few moments of silent meditation and then play music.  I think that some of the survey respondents like the music because it soothes them into a place where deep thought and connection with God can actually take place.  But for some the music is a hindrance to silent meditation and that deep connection to prayer, God, and self.  It is hard to be silent and yet Shabbat is all about rest which at some point or another is about silence.  So I am trying an experiment and, for the Shabbatot in March when I am leading services, silent mediation will be silent.  Come join me in a quiet conversation with God that might naturally arise in the silence.

L’shalom,

Margot

I love this Shabbat reading, which I’ve adapted from Siddur Likrat Shabbat.  I hope you find it meaningful as well.

A great pianist was once asked by an ardent admirer: “How do you handle the notes as well as you do?”  The artist answered: “The notes I handle no better than many pianists, but the pauses between the notes—ah!  That is where the art resides.”

In great living, as in great music, the art may be in the pauses.  Surely one of the enduring contributions which Judaism made to the art of living was the Shabbat, “the pause between the notes.”  So if you are looking to restore to your life a sense of serenity and sanctity, why not try Shabbat?  Not as a day of limits and “I can’t,” but rather as a way of pausing and reflecting.  I promise you, the notes (all of the things on your to-do list) will still be waiting.  But perhaps you’ll handle them with greater artistry. Shabbat Shalom!

What’s your favorite kind of Hamantaschen?

Personally, I’m a big nutella fan but I know that is not a traditional flavoring. Apricot, Prune and Mun (which is a poppy seed kind of mixture that I am not even sure most people ever heard of) are what most people are used to when they think of Hamantaschen.  And now, if I am to believe a myriad of posts and pictures on Facebook and Instagram, there are all sorts of savory flavors making their debut –Caramelized Onion & Goat Cheese Hamantaschen, Savory Meat Pie Hamantaschen, French Onion Soup Hamantaschen. And then there are the crazy sounding sweet ones like Candy Candy Hamantaschen, Dulce de Leche Hamantashen and Maple Pecan Hamantaschen. If you don’t believe me, go online and check out all the fun folks are having inventing new flavors for these no-longer-simple triangle cookies!

Having never been a traditionalist, I kind of like all this experimentation with one of the symbols of Purim. It is way better than folks deciding that hamantaschen are old-fashioned and they just shouldn’t eat them at all. To me, it shows that traditions do not have to be inflexible. Which when you think about it, is what we are trying to do here in general at Temple Beth Abraham. From testing out a variety of Friday night service times, to creating new experiences for 5^th grade families in school, our community is actively involved in experimentation. And that is wonderful because we are taking tradition and making it ours. And even if you’re not exactly ready for those Savory Meat Pie Hamantaschen, I hope you will experiment with Judaism in your own way, and find your very own personal flavor.

Chag Sameach!

Pam Barkley

Last week and yesterday I had the opportunity to meet and have discussions with my colleagues.  Last week’s meeting involved my local colleagues from Westchester, yesterday’s from New Jersey. I am blessed to have the best group of colleagues in the world and I’d like to tell you why. As a group they came from all walks of life to take on the management of their respective Temples and synagogues. Until recently, there were no training programs to prepare people for synagogue management so almost everyone arrives with a background from a different industry-both profit and non-profit, large multi-nationals, mom and pops.  That variety already provides a vast array of experience at the table. Although each one of us becomes ensconced in the life and culture of our particular institution, we have common denominators. We all work with lay-led boards, volunteers, our clergy, and the other professionals on staff. There are many personal and professional relationships to cultivate and manage. And since each of us works within these parameters every day we are the only ones who know the ins and outs of being the administrator for that unique collection of people known as a congregation. And, now for the best part, we all share what we know and experience with each other. Since we are not really in competition there is no harm in cooperating with each other. Although I met my local colleagues for the first time last week I was already part of the group the minute that I indicated my affiliation with Temple Beth Abraham. Having this vast knowledge base stretching across the country to tap at any time is one of the most rewarding parts of doing this work and benefits the Temple as well. On behalf of all of my colleagues, I wish all of you a Shabbat Shalom!

 Shabbat Shalom! We were reminded this week of Ed Koch, of blessed memory, and all of his accomplishments.  The former Mayor of New York City greeted people with the phrase “how’m I doin?” and he genuinely wanted to know.  Last Sunday our Ritual Chair, Jodie Lane, sent out a survey as part of our Shabbat Evening experiment with service times and she asked how are we doing. We all genuinely want to know.  We have heard for years from people on the receiving line and during oneg how much they love coming to services, how wonderfully warm the community is and how relaxed and refreshed they feel when we have finished but that it is so too hard to get back out on a Friday night after a long week of work, school and schlepping.  It seems to be a refrain that once you arrive home and take off your shoes it is hard to put them on again and head back out.  From others who are regularly at TBA on a Friday night we have heard that they couldn’t possibly get to TBA before 8:00pm because they don’t get out of work early enough to go home have dinner and then be ready to come to TBA.  From some we have heard that 8:00pm is just too late.  So like Goldilocks we are wondering here at TBA is 5:45pm too early, too late or just right?  What about 8:00pm or is there a better time on a Friday night for your family?  Last Sunday you received an email from Jodie asking  you about your Shabbat experience and desires.  Just in case you missed it or you hadn’t had a chance to fill it out yet there is still time and we are interested in your thoughts.  I have included the survey below but please forward your thoughts to Jodie at jodieritual@gmail.com.  This coming Tuesday, February 12 at 8:00pm the Ritual Committee will meet to discuss the results of the survey and to plan for what service times will be starting in April.  If you would like to hear what people are thinking and share your thoughts with the committee  please feel free to join us.

As you may know, for the last few months we have been experimenting with our Friday night Shabbat service times.  Although we know that it is impossible to find a time that is perfect for everyone, we very much want to provide worship opportunities that work for those who want to be here on Shabbat evening.  We now need your help to go forward.  In fact, we simply can’t go any further without your input. Please reply to these questions with your thoughts on the following:

1)  Are you interested in attending Friday night services on a regular basis?  If so, what time or times would best allow you to do that?

2)  In the past three months have you attended either the 5:45pm or 8:00pm Friday night services? If so, how often?  How do these times work for your schedule?

3)  We would love to hear any of your comments or ideas about how to improve the Friday night experience.

Since we would like to review your responses at an upcoming Ritual Committee Meeting, please respond no later than Monday, February 11.

We really do want to know what you think and how we are doing so please fill out the survey above and forward it to Jodie.

Shabbat shalom,

Margot